MALE-ON-MALE MASSAGE: GAY?
Posted by terrance | Filed under Happenings
I took a vacation last week. I needed one. It’d been years since I’d taken a day off, let alone a series of days. The journey of seeing REPO! The Genetic Opera turned into a movie—although a dream come true—kicked my ass. I’ve not been myself for a while; I’ve been sluggish, achy, unfocused. So, I resolved to take a week off and reboot before diving headfirst into my next big project, an original graphic novel entitled The Molting.
April 27th-May 4th.
I’m not typically one for lounging out on beaches, slow-roasting in the sun, but I felt like I needed to go somewhere tropical, someplace remote where I would not be tempted to work. I decided on a place, and went.
I’ve never done anything like this before. I’ve always regarded these sorts of getaways as the spoiled luxuries of a class that I was never a part of, so I feel slightly awkward revealing my trip to you now. I also feel awkward telling you that I paid to have somebody massage me while I was there (no, not the “happy endings” kind of rubdown…a real massage!).
I’ve had a couple of professional massages in my life. They’ve each felt great, but I always feel awkward committing to them. There’s something about the notion of self-pampering that the rough upbringing portion of my brain regards as “soft”. But, much in the same way that this week-off was needed, my body needed some sort of rehabilitation; I’ve been nursing a series of aches, including what I call “The evil stroke arm”. So, I suppressed my worries about being perceived as a spoiled princess and booked a paradise-like trip and an appointment with a masseuse…yet I was completed unprepared for the unforeseen, unexplored dimensions of awkwardness that awaited me: my masseuse…was male.
The Man-sseuse Experiment.
All of the masseuses that I’ve had in the past have been female. I didn’t request this. It’s just who showed up, so the concept of drawing the shortest straw (or in this case, the longest) never really occurred to me.
Now, I’m not homophobic. I was just raised in a rather “street” environment, where the fella’s from the neighborhood would surely raise an eyebrow at the notion of one of their brethren coddling himself on some beach resort, let alone being oiled up on a table by a dude in flip-flops and a towel. I might as well be getting a bikini wax and a pedicure.
And I know it’s not just me. Meeting my Man-ssuese, I immediately got the sense that no matter how many Man-ssages he’s given—or will give—there will always be that awkward first handshake. Any good proctologist would tell you the same (We both know where that finger’s been, Doc, and where it’s goin’ next, so the real question is, what do we do now?).
But this guy, he had his game down pat: rather than breaking the ice by talking about, say, gladiator films, he described how he works on his father occasionally who suffers from back pains. I would’ve went with the ol’ GHB diversion, but then he goes and brings up dear old daddy. Nicely played, sir. Nicely played.
And just like that, I was horizontal, facedown, bearing into a massage pillow, nearly naked. The only thing that could’ve made this beefy exchange seem any more gay is the Enya CD, which he played as he worked. That, and there’s nothing like the wet sounds of lotion being pumped from a tube, squishing between fingers, to make one think of male masturbation.
Once the Man-ssage began, however, most of my apprehensions faded. His hands were more thorough, and certainly much stronger, than anything I’d yet experienced on one of these tables. So, my focus became more about endurance: all prison rapes end in tears, but they all end, and I knew that the beating that my achy muscles were taking would have a silver lining in the form of a release of tension.
I made the mistake of telling my Man-ssuese that my neck in particular had been sore and causing headaches, so this is the area where he focused the majority of his efforts. Visions of Abu Ghraib soared through my mind as he pounded away on my neck, as well as strange and useless trivia, like the realization that most of the muscles holding up our skulls and brain matter are no bigger than our pinkies.
Buried pains from old injuries surfaced, like the ankle I sprained years ago and the thumb fractures I attained when punching a boy in high school without fully tucking my thumb under the ball of my fist.
I also thought about how red my skin must of turned, this pale hide of mine that’s always been so vulnerable to sunburns and bug bites. The same skin that took on the shapes of the rocks on the beach that I fell asleep against later in the trip, as if my back were made of some mutant material from the likes of an X-Men movie.
I rose up from the table at the end of the session. The pain stopped, but the awkwardness returned. Our departing handshake—and the cash tip that I handed him—had all the subtle choreography of a John who after finishing the deed has second thoughts, and worries about what diseases he may now be taking home to his unsuspecting wife and kids.
Awkward or not, my Man-ssage released some of the stress that my workaholic self has been storing for years, so I would do it again, Man-ssuese or not. Here’s to walking into bathhouses with a hard-on and a bottle of Champagne, like gentlemen!
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May 6th, 2009 at 12:39 pm
Congrats on a well-deserved vacation. And I say this every time I read a blog of yours, but you’re a great writer and never fail to make me laugh.
Regarding massages, you are a stronger man [HAHA] than I, seeing as I become uncomfortable lying nearly naked on a table with anyone, male or female, oiling me up. Yikes.
Maybe it’s just the clinical setting.
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May 6th, 2009 at 12:40 pm
Terrance.
You slay me. I think I peed a little reading this. Your story-telling abilities continue to amaze me.
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May 6th, 2009 at 12:42 pm
I swear to you, we’ve spent the last 3 days talking about BODY MASSAGE (as in the parody G.I. Joe Fenslerfilm things) and then you made this post. It was kind of amazing.
MR. BODY MASSAGE MACHINE~
I’m glad you’re getting some of that stress out, though. You seemed really burned out and definitely in need of a vacation the last time I saw you.
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May 6th, 2009 at 12:43 pm
LoL Great story! Everyone needs a vacation, sometimes:)
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May 6th, 2009 at 12:51 pm
first of all, i love that the captcha word is rent…as in the musical, approbo yes?
that infamous trip to san francisco i wanted to end with a massage and there was one male – one female left. no way was i going to let maia get the male, so i reluctantly said ok.
im not worried about the gay thing, obviously thinking that a male gay masseuse in san fran WAS gay, but here is always my experience with male masseuses. they hurt. the experience, of tending to sore muscles with touch and pressure, cough, cough, is true enough but its also supposed to be relaxing. im not relaxing while getting hammered, cough cough or while wincing with pain by some dudes non knowledge of his own strength on tender female muscles. the sounds, the water, the dark lit room??? needs a woman. im sorry but it needs a woman who usually with their slow, YES SLOW BECAUSE THAT REMINDS ME THIS GUY WAS FAST! LOL, just like a guy…the women are slow, and careful and im not a lesbian but i do like the sensual quality of it all – from the tender hands of a female.
i ought to know. i give a great massage terrance…
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May 6th, 2009 at 12:53 pm
I absolutely love this blog. You always make me laugh or think..or spit soda onto my laptop screen( thanks for that by the way!)
This reminds me of everytime I say the words “getting a facial” to any of my male friends.
I can hear the snickering as I type.
And I do suggest to anyone in need of relaxing..getting a nice soothing facial. Our faces store up so much stress in their tiny muscles.
Thanks to the porn industry this amazing hour of relaxation will never be seen with the dignity and respect it deserves…lol
Seriously Terrance..you should try it:)
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May 6th, 2009 at 1:11 pm
… was anyone else oddly aroused when reading this, or is that just me?? >.>
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May 6th, 2009 at 1:20 pm
Terrance, I love your stories! ^_^ I’m glad you enjoyed your man-ssage! You really deserved a day of relaxing, akward or not.
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May 6th, 2009 at 1:21 pm
Oh Terrance, you make me giggle so much.
Don’t feel bad about getting the massage! They’re so nice. I’m sure your fans, myself included won’t think anything of you for having a man-seusse.
Hopefully DLB won’t be too jealous though. =/
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May 6th, 2009 at 1:24 pm
“thumb fractures I attained when punching a boy in high school without fully tucking my thumb into the ball of my fist”
Terrance, I say this with love, but you’re an idiot. NEVER tuck your thumb into your fist when you’re punching someone. You’re lucky you just fractured it, I knew a girl in kickboxing class who did the same (newbie) and she outright BROKE her thumb. Bloody hell, the howl she let out at that. *shudder* Keep your thumb outside the fist, wrapped around your fingers (why yes, you did just get fighting tips from a tiny female ten years younger than you, deal with it).
Regardless, glad you had a relaxing holiday.
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May 6th, 2009 at 1:27 pm
What is with all the Enya? I just had a facial/massage yesterday and of course that is what was playing. I would feel a lot more relaxed listening to something very Anti-Enya… Oh well, the massage was great!
Glad you had a fabulous vacation!
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May 6th, 2009 at 1:39 pm
I would totally say that it’s the same for woman-on-woman massages… but it’s really not.
I actually helped a friend for about an hour and a half – she has some heavy issues and needed it. I worked on her back, shoulders, neck, legs, and helped her stretch when we were done. She asked if I’d had any training or certifications (when I was done – a might backwards, huh?) and when I told her no, she was very insistent that I look into getting training. She was pretty sure I had a knack for it.
I’ll be registering in the fall, or possibly next year, depending on my budget…. did I mention I met her through 6 degrees of Repo? Yeah… just one more way that Repo is affecting my life LOL
I’m glad you had a vacation, you definitely deserved it! <3
Kris
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May 6th, 2009 at 2:03 pm
Congrats on your vacation and therapeutic massage! They really do wonders for the mind, body, and soul!
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May 6th, 2009 at 2:09 pm
My God, forgive me, but I laughed to tears how hilarious this sounds XDD
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May 6th, 2009 at 2:26 pm
why sir, this is not gay. it is only therapy hiding under the mask of gay-ness. do not fear, for your heterosexuality is quite intact. the fact that you would be comfortable enough do it again proves it right there.
Much non gay love,
ash
[lol]
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May 6th, 2009 at 2:26 pm
What’s going on with the Repo sequel? Are you guys pretty sure there’ll be another one? Man, Graverobber should get an origins movie. He’s way cuter than Wolverine!
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May 6th, 2009 at 3:05 pm
Glad you got the kinks out.. so to speak ;p
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May 6th, 2009 at 3:07 pm
I have to say I am amused at how nervous straight guys get about being touched by another guy, yet when you watch a football game these big brawny guys have no problem standing behind another guy and waiting to catch something between his legs… Seriously I do not understand men.
I’m glad the masseur got rid of your knots & aches.
Also, if you’re ever in a position to punch someone again, please remember Anaesthesia’s advice. She’s quite right.
Thanks for another entertaining blog!
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May 6th, 2009 at 3:34 pm
Oh Terrance, your blogs always make me giggle.
There’s nothing wrong with a massage from a man. They have those really strong hands that are awesome for getting out knots in your back and stuff.
Glad you had a great vacation.
CapnG/Gina
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May 6th, 2009 at 3:48 pm
This was amazing. I had a mini-gasm while reading this lol. Your story telling makes me a happy panda. <3
(you sure no happy ending?)
“Here’s to walking into bathhouses with a hard-on and a bottle of Champagne, like gentlemen!” I laughed like a madwoman.
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May 6th, 2009 at 4:05 pm
It’s awesome that you got a nice break from things. I know you needed it! I actually dated a guy for over a year that was a masseuse, and he’d tell me about guys who, upon seeing him, would turn stark white and refuse to be worked on. It always amused me. Us girls, we can do what we want to each other and nobody cares, but man on man touching…it’s just…funny. LOL
Glad you had a great time!!
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May 6th, 2009 at 4:54 pm
Glad you got your relaxing (if slightly uncomfortable!) vacation! You deserve it after the last few months you’ve had with the REPO! tours!
And I have to agree with Xavi’s remark, lol. You see guys wrestling each other or playing football or something like that, but then they get all uncomfortable with having to hug or get a massage from another guy. You silly men. =P
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May 6th, 2009 at 5:29 pm
Hmmmm….all that goes through my mind is that you signed my ass…..I hope that did not scar you….
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May 6th, 2009 at 5:46 pm
*You* took a vacation? Bravo! You deserved every last bit of that R&R, don’t tell yourself any different. Hope those bugbites (?) didn’t itch too much!
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May 6th, 2009 at 6:12 pm
Way to take it like a real man.
p.s. this may have just made my day…er…night, East Coast time
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May 6th, 2009 at 6:15 pm
This was the highlight of my day. I always get a good chuckle reading these. Nice pics too. So nice to see some place that isn’t dark and rainy!
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May 6th, 2009 at 7:53 pm
This gave me a good laugh, for which I thank you.
I’m so glad you achieved the rest you deserved.
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May 6th, 2009 at 8:10 pm
“I also feel awkward telling you that I paid to have somebody massage me while I was there (no, not the “happy endings” kind of rubdown…a real massage!).”
Sure, Terrance. Sure. Pix or it did not happen.
<3 Jude and Kat.
PS. Glad you did get a vacation. You deserve one, sir.
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May 6th, 2009 at 8:39 pm
I’m glad you got a vacation, T; from what I’ve seen and heard, you richly deserved one. You do so much for us fans. I could go on and on about how much I love this fandom, but I’ll spare you that–I’m sure you’ve heard it a billion times before. Suffice it to say that it’s the best one I’ve ever been part of, and you’re a big part of that.
I feel like I have to say here how much I enjoy reading these blogs. Two reasons why. The first is, they’re just entertaining in and of themselves. You are a brilliant writer, and reading these never fails to bring a smile to my face, no matter how shitty of a mood I’m in. For example, for my most recent creative writing assignment, I had to hand in a list of things I wanted to use. One of those things was, “a metaphor worthy of Terrance Zdunich.” Of course, then I had to explain to my teacher who that was, and I’m debating which of your blogs to print out to show him. This one might be a good choice, I think, or the one about Digital Snapshots.
The second thing is, I love to find out more about you as a person. I’ve never been one to obsess about celebrities, since they’re so distant; I can’t get to know them. But you? To paraphrase a friend, you’re basically a normal guy, only wonderful. It’s incredible that you’ve been able to accomplish so much, and you deserve every bit of the love you get from fans, like you talked about last entry. The love you have for all of us shows in all you’ve done for us. You’re a good guy, T, and I hope I can meet you someday.
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May 6th, 2009 at 11:14 pm
Glad you had a good vacation, T. Sounds like you were over due for it. Glad you got away for a while. Hope you enjoyed your man-ssuse and Enya. I can even feel the akwardness from here. Poor you. I think you need a female’s hug. I’m always available for that.
Is that a pic of your bear backside? Terrance! you could give a gal a nose bleed that way. Not saying I got one….
<..> >_<
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May 7th, 2009 at 1:51 am
That’s a mightly long week-long vacation, if it lasted from March 27 to May 4.
Glad to hear you had a good vacation….you definitely deserve it.
Now get the f*ck back to work.
~Ms Smiles
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May 7th, 2009 at 8:56 am
It’s about time you got some TLC. You should do it more. I carry my stress in my neck and shoulders which causes headaches and my 20 year old, 240 pound son is nice enough to massage out the kinks. A man can always give you a much better massage. Unless you had an orgasm from the mere mention of his touch, I don’t think you have anything to worry about.;-p Enya is a very relaxing music. I would say you came away from all of this with your masculinity firmly intact.
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May 7th, 2009 at 10:33 am
Terrance,
you crack me up! I love you and your wit and your writing skills. All excellent…
And TRUST me when I say I’ve been there and DONE that! It took me awhile to get my first massage (regardless gay or not)… and in fact, up until last year I couldn’t bring myself to be almost nude on a table while either female OR male took to work out my kinks.
But, I have to say, when finally said and done – I understand now why people get it done. Because it works!
The same thing with Pedicures… I used to hate the thought of my smelly (at end of day) worn out feet would be in the hands of someone else to just put nail polish on them… I found it degrading for the longest time and was way to guilt ridden to want to even subject someone to doing them. I then got a gift certificate… practically forced… Needless to say, I went prepared with Legs shaven and feet already washed… to make it easier. Well… I no longer have guilty feelings… But word to the wise – do not get a pedicure AND a facial at the same time (facial something you may skip all together but…for any other female readers looking at this) they do more then JUST nail polish or man-icure… They exfoliate the legs massaging them while dunking your feet in warm water to wash them. Then they wrap shins and feet in heated towels – most times, if you pay for it they place parafin wax under the towels in order for them to become soft as a baby’s butt. They then take your foot and massage it. Now this is the cool part – something I NEVER knew. Reflexology works! Especially with someone who knows about it and knows what tey are doing…
I had lower back pain for weeks (stress with break-up and beginning stages of divorce) as she was massaging the bottom of my foot she came across a big knot. Something I felt instantly as she pushed in. She seriously instantly looked up at me and asked if had lower back pain. I looked at her leary, thinking she was about to come out with some psychic mumbo jumbo and ask for another $20.00, but she pressed on the knot again and I squirmed. And the fact she said LOWER back pain. I asked “how do you know”, she said “you have a knot in your foot the size of a quarter” then went into a speech about reflexology. Needless to say she massged the knot out thoroughly and for the next several, several weeks, my back pain was GONE!
Now I know all this pampering is strange in many ways, but being influenced by it and actually getting some of it done, I understand how pampering can make us feel better, and more confident we are doing something good for ourselves and our own well being… Recharged if you will. That way, in the long run we will stand up with our new fresh relaxed feeling and create more art, photography, blogs and REPO movies…
Ok… I BABBBBBBBLing on and on –
Terrance, I am very glad you enjoyed your Vacation! Looks like you enjoyed my favorite paradise spot… DAMN… LUCKY… The Islands WILL be my next place to visit… Oh yes… My Timeshare awaits occupancy once again… Which Island did you relax on with your Man-sseuse?
I do hope you write more about your trip…
Have a great rest of the week!
Michele
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May 7th, 2009 at 10:36 am
p.s. Facial and pedicure… Forgot to mention – at facial the ALSO (most places I think) exfoliate and massage your legs and arms… so they day I did a double dose of exfoliation on my legs… THEY BURNED like a Mother-F R….
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May 7th, 2009 at 2:53 pm
Glad to hear you had a great vacation, can’t think of anyone else who deserves it as much. Sometimes you just need to get away and forget about all your troubles, everything but the feel of your masseuse’s strong, manly hands digging into your…I’m sorry I got distracted.
Anyways, don’t burn yourself out, hon. Vacation more when you need it. Everyone has to recharge their batteries on occasion.
Can’t wait for your graphic novel!
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May 7th, 2009 at 6:22 pm
I am glad that you had a lovely vacation.
I give massages too. ^_~ Everyone tells me I’m good.
Just in case we ever happen to meet…LOL.
Anyway, back to you. Please take care of yourself, and we’re all looking forward to more wonderful work from you.
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May 8th, 2009 at 8:34 am
Well, the most important thing is that you feel more relaxed now and that the pain is away, isn’t it?
It is so entertaining reading this. I like how you write.
And if everything goes wrong, I can give a massage too
Have a nice day!
Kate
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May 9th, 2009 at 12:06 pm
Well, from the look of the previous comments you have plenty of choice for a female masseuse should any aches and pains return to bother you.
Good to hear you got a break, even if there was a little bit of trauma involved (hey, it’s all research for writing aint it?). Hope you’re all ready to crack on with ‘The Molting’, I can’t wait to get a copy.
I have no idea why Enya is so popular for massages, maybe when people get an Enya CD when they qualify. Though there was one time when I heard non-Enya music, not a massage but a leg waxing. The woman had an Alice Cooper CD, which was cool till it got to ‘Feed My Frankenstein’. Nothing like a woman smearing hot wax over your inner thighs while singing along to a song about oral sex to cause a bit of awkwardness.
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May 9th, 2009 at 1:35 pm
Totally not wierd to get a massage. Heck after working on Repo! you deserve it, and it’s not like the guy just randomly was like “Hey dude! I’m gunna give you a massage!” If that was the case…then you might want to worry.
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May 10th, 2009 at 1:44 am
I don’t quite know how to go about this without laughing so let’s just go with this: It sounds like you had an interesting time…and at least a little fun.
I’ve had plenty of massages in my life, extensive, tense scars are soothed by soft hands, but I have NEVER had any of my massues be a man…that would creep me out beyond all reasoning I think.
I’m glad you finally buckled down and took a damn vacation, was there at least some sleep involved with all of that?
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May 10th, 2009 at 7:19 am
It’s about bloody time you took some time off to yourself! You’ve been a slave to Repo! for quite a while now, among other things I’m sure…
It’s amazing how much a week of avoiding all the usual drudgery can make you refreshed and even more focused. Much in the same way that a good massage can ease away all the tension and aches just long enough to get yourself back in the game better than before.
While the man-sseuse may have been a daunting thing to walk in on, I’m betting you’re feeling much better for it! And no, no-one’s gonna think any less of you for letting a man in a towel oil you up… In fact, most of your fangirls out there are probably quite aroused by this news!
I’m looking forward to finally reading The Molting when it’s finished, but just make sure you get the rest you need along the way too. All your adoring fans would be heartbroken if you ran yourself into the ground… *hugs*
Love and lollipops xxx
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May 10th, 2009 at 10:42 am
*giggles* You damn sure are a funny one! Honestly, guys are so weird, and you’re no exception! I hope you at least felt somewhat relaxed, muscle- and old-injury-wise, if a bit mentally weirded out.
But then again, we all know you’re mental (in the best way possible), so it’s okay!!
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May 10th, 2009 at 8:59 pm
Glad you finally got some well deserved rest!
Keep up the good work Terrence. Hope I can see you sometime in the future.
That all sounds so nice. Don’t worry about the fact that you got a massage from a man, it’s perfectly fine. Pretty much everything’s been said already, so I’ll leave this post short.
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May 11th, 2009 at 1:22 pm
Yah, pretty gay. And what the heck part of your body is in that final photo? Lol, your wrist and your…….
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May 11th, 2009 at 3:15 pm
I am glad to hear the hard working Terrance, finally got a vacation. A well deserved one at that.
I haven’t had a massage before, but I have had a manicure and pedicure, and that was a bit awkward for me on my travels to NY, because I am not one to let people touch my feet (very ticklish haha) but afterward I didn’t want to walk around because it removed all that extra tension from walking around all day in the big city, and now I am glad that I did get it. Sometimes you have to let yourself be pampered even if you aren’t used to it 
. I just hope you finally buckled down and got some damn sleep 
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May 12th, 2009 at 3:05 pm
Oh Terrance…! That was a serious mindfuck!
So glad you got a Vacation, as you were scaring me with those hollow eyes. As for the Man-sseuse TOTALLY NOT GAY! My dirty mind may have gone their, but that’s because girls like me love Boy/Boy love. Trufax.
Anyway, take more vacations because all work and no play make TZ a dull artist! Love and Light Sweetie.
PS: If you couldn’t already tell, this blog made me happy and horny!
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May 14th, 2009 at 7:30 pm
dont worry massages are weird for everyone involved!!!
i was in massage school and was giving a client a foot massage and i swear she had an orgasm on the table!!! she was moaning and groaning, two of the other students peeked in to see what was happening!!! it took everything i had not to laugh. so dont feel bad about feeling awkward.
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May 15th, 2009 at 11:13 am
Its truly amazing that you are very secure and can write about that confidently. I am a bisexual gurl, and it makes me proud that even though you are definately not gay, (THANK GOD. I would die inside) you can still get a massage by a man. Yet again, you are my hero.
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May 16th, 2009 at 8:15 am
^_^ I never could have relayed it so delightfully. I had similar unease last year for my little sister’s wedding. She seemed to think I needed to be primped up a bit for her function so to keep bridezilla at bay I submitted to getting a sort of make over. I’ve had my nails done once before so I kind of knew what I was in for there but the pedicure was very foreign.
I have to admit after the trauma was over my feet felt very nice and all my nails had a fresh coat of “pearled pink” or some over name of descriptive cute. Did feel kind of guilty though spending the money to have someone else do something I’m technically capable of doing.
End of the story and perhaps most important, I at least looked like her very fashion orientated friends standing in the line of witnesses and bridezilla didn’t eat me as a pre-wedding stress reduction snack.
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May 18th, 2009 at 7:20 pm
Male on Male massage = Hot (might just be me and my friends that think so though)
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May 18th, 2009 at 11:25 pm
So my first day home in a month, and this is what I see. As for the subject matter, I gave my opinion to you already, after making someone read this to me over the phone. To the other readers of these replies: you have not heard a Terrance blog until someone totally non repo-related reads it to you. Choose an elderly relation. It’s excellent.
Dear Terrance. Grammar loves you, no matter how much (or often) you kill it.
“I also thought about how red my skin must of turned”
Remove of. Insert Have. Or at least ‘ve
And if you keep it up I am going to grade and send you corrected copies. Little red marks everywhere.
:p
It’s a good thing you’re a genius, sir.
Love, as ever,
Peaches
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May 19th, 2009 at 1:52 am
Dear Peaches,
“Grammar loves you, no matter how much (or often) you kill it.”
Technically it should read:
“Grammar loves you, no matter how frequently (or often) you kill it.”
Just teasing… but that’s one of my own pet peeves so I found the irony amusing. I’m sure you too are a genius, so no red marks on your homework <3
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May 24th, 2009 at 2:57 pm
only gay if you make it gay
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May 26th, 2009 at 8:58 pm
Dear you absolutely needed and deserve the time off to unwind. Im sure the past year (hell really the past several) have been crazy. I’m glad to hear that youre doing well and that Repo’s really taking off.!
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May 28th, 2009 at 12:41 am
Hi there Terrance. This is my first time encountering any brainbaby of yours that wasn’t REPO! You know, the gothic, gorgeous and all around monolith of a masterpiece?
Yeah, that one with the soft-core porn, skin peeling, murder, abduction and drug-boogers.
My reaction?
It’s like you’re the Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde of brilliance. On one hand you can be the goddamn Graverobber, and on the other you can be making my lungs rupture from laughter over man-sseuseage.
I salute you and your hijincks, both murderous and merry, good sir.
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June 1st, 2009 at 4:20 pm
I think there was a Seinfeld episode where George Costanza tells a similar story.
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June 9th, 2009 at 9:51 pm
I’m glad you got to rest Z.^^
No i don’t thimk it was very gay at all…you were just over thinking things really.^^
Keep it real
~A new fan~
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June 18th, 2009 at 8:48 am
Hahahaha…I almost peed myself. That was amazing. My sister is a massage therapist and tought me everything she knows(and no, not the happy ending type-even after hearing the sighs and reactrions like someone kicked their puppy) Works pretty well(being tought by sis) when one hasent the time for school. lol
And you know, you can always request a female when you make your appointment.
But I am glad to hear that you would get another reguardless of it being male/female.
I’m glad to hear the vaca went so well! lol
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July 14th, 2009 at 7:55 pm
Mr. Zdunich,
“all prison rapes end in tears, but they all end” is now what I say to myself when I need to get things done. Works like a charm.
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July 25th, 2009 at 7:42 pm
I know that this is a bit of a late response as I am working my way from most recent to oldest. But I can’t stop reading your blogs. They are so entertaining!
Any how, it isn’t gay to have a male masseuse. I think it is all based on what you want out of it. I prefer Men because they are typically stronger. Since I am a performer and puppeteer, it need that. I know that while I am being worked on, it is going to suck. I am going to clench my fists, I am going to bite the pillow and I may scream, but it will feel better when they are done.
Now if you want Pampering and just a general rub down, a female may be better suited.
But I think you made a good choice to stick it out with the male masseuse. It seems that you needed to take a beating to feel better.
Here’s to paying people to beat us up!
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November 27th, 2009 at 5:31 pm
[...] a little too forthcoming, what with my tales of masturbation, Down’s syndrome stomping, and homoerotic massages. No, the reason I’ve scrambled to provide a satisfying answer to this frequent and extremely [...]
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January 5th, 2010 at 9:00 pm
I know I’m late with my response, but I am looking over the whole site. Sounds hot to me. Wish I could have been there.
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July 6th, 2010 at 7:26 pm
Glad you finally got some rest, love, you deserve it.
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